The days have been flying at pace faster than the wink of an eye. Much has happened over the course of the past three years. In fact, quite a lot. There have been many happy moments. Occasions when I've been thoroughly satisfied and pleased. Yet there has been a flicker of a thought that says I can and should be doing much better. I've always been conscious of this thought. The very fact that it has lingered so long is proof that it has burrowed itself in the deep recesses of my mind.
It was a foolish blunder on my part not to have studied hard and to have made my way into one of the IIT's. I got into a top college nonetheless, but the past three years have been far from satisfactory. It's been frustrating, and I know it. All said and done, I settled for something that was second best. Second best not because it was imposed on me, but I chose to impose it on myself. And that is something that I am not proud of at all.
Why does one willingly and knowingly abandon the right course of action in life and regret it later? Why did I choose procratination over hard work, and trade common sense for sluggishness? These are questions that I have to answer. I cannot wish them away.
It is true that I have not lived up to my own expectations. But since when has life been a smooth affair for anyone? People make mistakes, and I've made mine. But the important thing for me is not to ponder over something that cannot be undone. Nothing can be done about milk that has already been split.
The time has come to cast myself into the future. I have an aim in mind - a goal that I desperately want to achieve. I am cognizant of what it takes to reach that goal post. There can be no substitute for hard work, and no replacement for discipline, for even the longest and most treacherous of journeys cannot be made without them.
I find the phoenix to be a most amazing creature. When it grows weak, it bursts into flames and reduces itself to ashes. But then it regrows from those very ashes, back again to a bird worthy of awe - a bird which can carry enormous weights and whose tears have healing powers.
The phoenix must rise.
